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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25849336">Vital Signs</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/aye_of_newt/pseuds/aye_of_newt'>aye_of_newt</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Umbrella Academy (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, I tried at least, No Incest, a little dash of angst, give Five a hug 2k21, maybe some funny parts too, now updated with more Five hugs, people actually listening to Klaus, s2: ep 6, s2: ep7, wholesome platonic brotherly hugs and hand-holding only</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 05:40:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,319</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25849336</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/aye_of_newt/pseuds/aye_of_newt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes, it's difficult for Klaus to tell if someone is alive or dead. </p><p>When Five shows up, covered in blood after killing the Board, Klaus panics.</p><p>In turn, Five processes his own trauma related to seeing his siblings’ deaths.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Number Five | The Boy &amp; Klaus Hargreeves</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>233</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2036</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Fave The Umbrella Academy, Semi-Functional Adults, The Best of Klaus, The Umbrella Academy, The umbrella academy, in love with Magic since 0 years old</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Heeey.</p><p>I'm back again so soon lmao. We're guaranteed to have quantity at least. </p><p> </p><p>Thanks to the people who encouraged me to actually write this! (I will do anything if someone expresses interest in my ideas tbh)</p><p>I hope it's what you wanted... or at least not too disappointing lol</p><p> </p><p>This chapter is an intro to the idea, next chapter is the meat. I'm just posting them both at once though because what the hell. Why not.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Klaus manifested ghosts, the spirits he conjured took on a blue hue which very clearly separates them from living beings. However, on his own, Klaus only ever saw the dead as they were in life⏤ real, solid, as if their body was standing there beside him. Of course, most of the time he could tell they were dead. After all, they often appeared out of thin air and sported some grievous wound. Peaceful deaths rarely made for ghosts. </p><p>However, there were times that it wasn’t so easy to tell. There were times Klaus sat and had a very lengthy conversation with a seemingly normal person, only for a passerby to stare at him with the hesitation that was only reserved for crazies who talked to the air. Or worse, he would lean forward to rest his hand on their arm only to pass through, sending cold shudders through his chest.</p><p>Klaus hated when that happened. It was unsettling. It made him feel as crazy as the people passing by assumed him to be. </p><p> </p><p>It was scary, not knowing what was real. </p><p> </p><p>If a ghost could come up and surprise him like that, lure him into a sense of security, then Klaus couldn’t trust anyone to be what he thought they were. </p><p> </p><p>Sometimes, Klaus needed to touch someone just to be sure. To him, there was nothing more grounding, more comforting, than the feel of life under his hands. Klaus couldn’t get enough of it. Even when they <em> hurt</em>, living hands were far better than the creeping grasp of death.</p><p> </p><p> When the world was black and painful and cold and the dead came shrieking and begging, Klaus did whatever he could to find life. </p><p>He let life bury him. Surround him. Drown out the crushing endless expanse of oblivion. When the void came calling, Klaus turned toward the nearest source of warmth he could like a moth to a flame. On nights when he had his <em> medicine </em>in one hand, and someone blessedly alive in the other, Klaus felt the closest he could to peace. </p><p>Sometimes, when he was haunted, <em> hunted, </em> by the bloody broken masses, Klaus was almost grateful for the unmistakable gore. It saved him the pain of disappointment when he realized there was nothing in the other person but endless, burning cold.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In an attempt to avoid his cult, <em> maybe he should have a “revelation” about private space at their next meeting, </em>Klaus decided to double back around to Elliott’s loft. He arrived only moments behind Diego and Luther, the three of them meeting in the alleyway with shared looks of mild surprise. </p><p>“What are you doing here?” Diego asked skeptically. </p><p>Klaus shrugged. “Came to see your beautiful face, darlin’.” He winked suggestively. </p><p>Diego rolled his eyes but didn’t ask any more questions, which was the goal. Klaus didn’t feel like getting a lecture from another brother on the irresponsibility of abandoning a cult.</p><p> </p><p>When they reached the apartment, Klaus was about to make straight for the bathroom when Diego stopped. “Look,” he said lowly. Luther and Klaus followed his gaze to the drops of blood on the floor. </p><p>Cautiously, they moved closer, Klaus trailing behind the other two. Luther bent and inspected the blood. It seemed fresh. </p><p>“Elliott?” Diego called. </p><p>There was no response. </p><p>Diego pulled a knife and ducked off to the side. Luther marched forward, Klaus in his shadow. </p><p> </p><p>In the living room, Elliott was standing over his desk chair, covered head to toe in gore, his eyes huge in shock and fear. </p><p>“Holy shit, Elliott,” Klaus cried. “Are you okay dude?” He took a few quick steps forward, his eyes glued to the horror of Elliott’s face. </p><p>“Klaus.” Luther gave him a strange look as he came up behind him, like he didn’t understand why Klaus had asked. “I think the answer is <em> no </em>.” </p><p>“I don’t understand,” Elliott whimpered, unmoving. “What’s happening?”</p><p>Luther went straight past Elliott, looking instead down at the chair.</p><p>Finally, Klaus followed his gaze to where a second Elliott was sitting, looking just as bloody but significantly less alert than the Elliott he saw when he first walked in. </p><p>“Oh,” Klaus breathed. "Well, fuck.” Elliott was very much dead.</p><p>“What’s happening?” he asked again.</p><p>Klaus looked at Elliott’s ghost a little helplessly. “You’re dead, buddy.”</p><p>“No kidding.” Diego rolled his eyes. He came over from the side door, looking down at Elliott grimly.</p><p>“I’m dead?” Elliott whispered, shock evident in his tone.</p><p>“Smooth, Klaus,” Ben commented dryly. </p><p>Klaus winced. Sometimes he forgot that not everyone was as desensitized to the Big Sleep as he was. Fresh ghosts tended to be a little touchy about their demise. “Sorry, man.”</p><p>Elliott nodded for a moment, his gaze far away. “I guess that makes sense.”</p><p>“What happened?” Klaus asked about as gently as he could.</p><p>“How should I know?” Luther responded, nudging Klaus to the side so he and Diego could cover the body.</p><p>“Elliott must have been getting too close to the truth,” Diego murmured intently. “This smells like the feds.” </p><p>“Woah, hold on,” Klaus tried to interrupt. “I can just ask⏤”</p><p>“What? Are you out of your mind?” Luther asked Diego. “If this was the federal government, they would take him somewhere and⏤”</p><p>“Guys?” Klaus tried again. “Elliott is right here; I can just ask him what⏤”</p><p>“Exactly!” Luther continued. “The feds would have kidnapped him.”</p><p>That wasn’t where Klaus was going with that. “Guys⏤”</p><p>“Oga Foroga,” Diego said. </p><p>“What?”</p><p><em> So apparently Luther could hear </em> <b> <em>Diego</em></b><em>, </em> Klaus thought a little bitterly.</p><p>“You know, if you didn’t lie about your powers so much, they might listen to you more,” Ben taunted sarcastically. </p><p>Klaus flipped him off. </p><p>“That a name?” Diego asked. </p><p>“Why don’t we ask Elliott?” Klaus suggested loudly. He turned to the ghost, smiling pleasantly. “Ring a bell?”</p><p>“Klaus, we’re trying to be serious here,” Luther chided. He went to the railing to glance over at what Diego was seeing. </p><p>Klaus, who liked to think he had a reasonably high level of patience for being ignored by his family, felt his eye twitch. He gestured helplessly to Elliott. </p><p>“I don’t know if it’s a name,” the ghost started, “but the guys who were here looked Scandi enough. Freaky-pale hair and eyes.”</p><p>“Oh shit. Guys?” Klaus called, trailing behind Luther and Deigo who had apparently gone for the phonebook. “I think the Swedish creeps were here.”</p><p>Luther and Diego didn’t look up from where they were hunched over the book, though Diego did offer a mild, “Bitch could be Swedish,” so at least Klaus knew they could still hear him speaking, even if they weren’t listening. </p><p>Luther started dialing and Klaus groaned. </p><p>“Oh my god,” Ben muttered, rubbing his temples. He looked exhausted for a guy who didn’t need to sleep.</p><p>“Hey, uh, Klaus?” Elliott stuttered. </p><p>“Yeah, buddy?” Klaus was feeling a little bad for the poor guy. He just got tortured to death and all. </p><p>“They were looking for your brother.”</p><p>Klaus’ stomach clenched. “What?”</p><p>“They wanted information on him.”</p><p>“What did you say?” Klaus didn’t quite mean to sound as harsh as he did, panic working its way into his voice. </p><p>“Nothing!” Elliott insisted quickly. “I didn’t say anything, I promise! I couldn’t have if I wanted to! I swear!” His eyes were so sincere, <em> so scared, </em> Klaus immediately felt bad. <em>Again</em>, he reminded himself, <em> the sap just got murdered.  </em></p><p>“Okay, sorry. I believe you. I was just⏤”</p><p>A flicker of motion caught the edge of Klaus’ vision and he turned. “Five!” he shouted with relief, some of the worry he’d felt at Elliott’s confession fading with all of his brothers present and accounted for. “I’m so happy to see you buddy, I was just⏤”</p><p>Klaus froze.</p><p>Five was drenched in blood. It covered his clothes in huge arcs, splattered grotesquely across his entire abdomen, while fresh scratches and smears of gore littered his face. </p><p>“Five?” Klaus asked, his voice cracking. He glanced behind him quickly to gage Luther and Diego’s response to what was happening. They appeared to not be paying any attention as they crowded around the phone. </p><p>Klaus looked back to Five, his body slowly turning to ice. “Oh no. Oh no. Oh no <em> ohnoohnoohnoohnoohno⏤” </em> </p><p>“Klaus?” Five asked, looking at him mild annoyance and a touch of concern. </p><p>“Oh little baby Five,” Klaus choked out. He raised his shaking hands to his sternum, cradling them against himself as his entire chest felt like it was ripping open. </p><p>“Klaus,” Ben said something but Klaus couldn’t hear the words over the sound of his own pounding heart. He knew he had started crying but felt oddly detached from the sensation of the tears against his cheeks. </p><p>Little Five, gone for so long and returned to them for far too short a time, was dead. </p><p>And Klaus was going to have to tell his siblings. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“Klaus!” Five shouted. </p><p>He looked up. At some point Klaus had slid to the ground without realizing it, his legs crumpled up under him awkwardly. Five stared down at him in very clear alarm. </p><p>“Klaus,” he repeated. “What is going on?”</p><p>Klaus let out a choked wail. “Five, oh baby brother. You’re dead. You’re dead. You’re <em> deadyou’redeadyou’redead.” </em>Dimly, Klaus was aware he was reaching hysterics but didn’t care. Five was dead. </p><p>“What are you talking about?” Five demanded, crouching down so he was eye-level with Klaus. </p><p>“You’re a ghost,” Klaus explained, hiccuping as he tried to control his sobs. </p><p>“What the⏤ Oh. Fuck. No!” Five slid quickly from confusion to realization. “Klaus, it’s okay,” he soothed. </p><p><em> Little Girl, Klaus wasn’t even the dead one and Five was trying to comfort him.  </em>“No, no it’s not,” Klaus cried harder. </p><p>“Klaus, <em> Jesus Christ, </em> what did you take?” Diego demanded, appearing behind Five. </p><p>“Diego!” he sobbed. “<em>Please</em>, believe me. Elliott’s ghost told me the Swedes were looking for Five and they must have found him and now he’s dead. He’s all bloody and <em> small </em> and hurt and he’s dead! He’s dead.” Klaus’ voice grew more desperate as he pleaded, his breath so uneven it was a wonder he hadn’t yet passed out. </p><p>“What the fuck are you talking about, Klaus?” Diego asked. “Five is right here.”</p><p>“I know and he’s⏤” Klaus stopped, a tiny sliver of rationality breaking through his blind panic. “You can see him?”</p><p>“Yeah, idiot,” Diego’s soft tone didn’t match his words. “Look.” Very carefully and deliberately, Diego reached out and poked Five on the arm. His finger didn’t pass through. He did it again three more times in quick succession. In any other instance, Five would have broken his finger for that. At present, he didn't seem to mind. “See?” Diego asked. “He’s real.”</p><p>Klaus looked quickly to Five’s face, which was stuck somewhere between shock and fear. His eyes were too big, blown wide as he stared at Klaus. “I’m okay,” he whispered, a slight tremble in his voice. “I’m not dead, Klaus.”</p><p>Klaus took a shaky breath, his mind still reeling. “Are you sure?”</p><p>Five’s lips twitched in the ghost⏤<em> no, not ghost, he wasn’t a ghost </em>⏤ of a smile. “Yeah. Pretty sure I’m still kicking”. </p><p>Becoming slightly more grounded, Klaus glanced around. He spotted Luther, who was standing a few feet off to the side looking very uncomfortable and a little panicked. “I see Five,” he assured Klaus, his voice strained as he stared at his brothers piled on the floor. </p><p>Klaus found Ben next, who also nodded quickly, concern clear in the pinch around his eyes. “He’s okay, Klaus. I promise.”</p><p>Finally, Klaus looked back to Five himself, who had not moved a hair. Slowly, Klaus reached one shaking hand out and placed it on Five’s own. It was covered in dried blood but the skin was warm under his touch. Klaus’ breath caught and he quickly leaned forward. He brought his other hand to Five’s chest, fumbling aside the blazer to press his palm flat over Five’s<em> beating </em>heart. </p><p>Five still did not move, allowing Klaus to confirm what he needed in his own time. His chest rose and fell gently under Klaus’ touch. </p><p><em>He was breathing.</em> </p><p> </p><p>With a choked whimper, Klaus seized Five and pulled him into his chest, wrapping his arms as tightly as he could around his brother. He buried his face in Five’s shoulder, needing every inch of contact he could get, needing to feel him breathe and live. Needing to keep him safe. </p><p>After a beat of hesitation, Five slowly hugged him back, patting Klaus’ back a little awkwardly while Klaus tried to steady his breathing. </p><p>“I’m fine, Klaus,” he muttered. “I’m not even really hurt. All this… isn’t mine.”</p><p>“Shh,” Klaus shushed him. “I’m never letting you go again you stupid reckless little time demon.” </p><p>Five gave a breathy laugh. “Well, unless you want to squish me, you’re going to have to.”</p><p>Quickly, Klaus let go, pulling back to look at Five with worry. “Did I hurt you?”</p><p>“No! No, you’re fine,” Five assured quickly. “I’m fine. Totally fine. Not dead. Not hurt.” He looked at Klaus seriously as he spoke. “I’m okay.”</p><p>“Right.” Klaus nodded, wiping his tear-stained cheeks quickly. “You’re okay. Sorry,” he sniffed roughly. “Didn’t mean to… over-react.” </p><p>“I didn’t mean to scare you,” Five told him softly. “Sorry.” </p><p>They all gave Klaus a minute to steady himself before speaking again. </p><p> </p><p>“What the fuck was that?” Diego asked when it appeared he'd calmed down some. “Klaus, you’ve never… <em>reacted</em> like that to anything before.”</p><p>“I…” Klaus wasn’t sure how to explain. “Sometimes, it’s hard to tell.” He admitted quietly. “Who is or isn’t alive. I need… context clues sometimes. But Five showed up and he was all bloody and you and Luther weren’t paying attention to him and Elliott said the creepy blonde guys were looking for him⏤”</p><p>“Wait, when did Elliott say that?” Luther demanded quickly. </p><p>Klaus frowned at him. “Just a few minutes ago. I told you.”</p><p>Luther blinked. “What?”</p><p>“Elliott’s ghost is here?” Diego asked, glancing around like he might be able to see it.</p><p>“That’s what I <em> told </em> you,” Klaus repeated. “You weren’t listening.” He didn’t speak with malice, but both Diego and Luther flinched. </p><p>“Fuck, Klaus…” Diego didn’t seem to know what to say. “I⏤ I’m sorry.”</p><p>“Yeah, uh, me too,” Luther added awkwardly. “Should have listened. We will next time.”</p><p>On another day, their assurances might have meant something to Klaus. It would have been gratifying to be taken seriously at least. But Klaus was too worn from the emotional rollercoaster of the past few minutes to fully register the promise. Instead, he just nodded dully, shrugging. </p><p>“Um, sorry to interrupt,” Elliott stammered. </p><p>Klaus looked at him. “What?”</p><p>“They were looking for Diego. Not Five.”</p><p>“Oh.”</p><p>“Klaus?” Diego was looking at him oddly, glancing from Klaus to the apparently empty air where Elliott stood.</p><p>“Elliott says that they were actually looking for you,” he informed Diego. “Before he said <em> brother </em>so when Five…”</p><p>“You assumed it was me,” Five finished nodding. “Makes sense.”</p><p>“Why are they⏤?” Luther started to ask.</p><p>“Revenge for killing their brother,” Five reasoned. There was long pause as they thought about what it had been like moments before when it was Klaus who thought his own brother might be gone. </p><p>“I mean, I don’t love it in this situation, but understandable I guess,” Klaus joked roughly. </p><p>No one laughed. </p><p> </p><p>Diego cleared his throat. “I’m sorry we didn’t listen, Klaus, an uh, Elliott. And like, sorry you died, man.”</p><p>“Oh well, you know. It was a much more interesting death than I thought I would have.” Elliott laughed a little unsteadily. </p><p>Klaus thought it seemed like he was adjusting fairly well. Considering. He got the morbid humor down at least. </p><p>“I think I’m going to have a lie-down,” Elliott said vaguely. He wandered off in the direction of his bedroom. </p><p>Klaus didn’t think it was appropriate to tell him he no longer needed to sleep.</p><p>He translated the conversation and departure for Elliott and made everyone uncomfortable. </p><p> </p><p>“Anyway,” Diego continued after staring in the direction he assumed Elliott went with a mildly disturbed look, “We were too focused on finding Olga Foroga. We were calling her when Five showed up, but we should have been paying attention.”</p><p>“Olga Foro⏤” Five started, his brow wrinkled in confusion. “What the fu⏤” His expression dropped into stony irritation. “<em> Oga for oga </em>, you idiots. Swedish for an eye for an eye.” </p><p>“Oh.” Diego at least had the decency to look at little embarrassed by that. </p><p>“We may have threatened to kill an old lady,” Luther added sheepishly. </p><p>Five closed his eyes and looked about a moment away from making a real Hargreeves brother ghost. “The things I put up with,” he hissed. </p><p>“I think we still got the general message,” Klaus managed to say, his joke still clearly strained as he fought to recover from his shock. </p><p>“Right,” Five agreed. He looked at Klaus softly, the way he usually reserved for Vanya. “Touche.” </p><p>It seemed like it was just going to that kind of day for awkward pauses. </p><p> </p><p>“So,” Luther broke the silence. “What <em> did </em>happen, Five?”</p><p>He didn’t respond, standing instead with a slight groan from being crouched so long. He extended a hand to Klaus. </p><p>Still trembling randomly, Klaus accepted it, allowing Five to help him up. </p><p>“Five?” Diego prodded. </p><p>He rolled his eyes. “Long story, no time.” Five deposited Klaus gently on the couch. “Hold on, I need to change,” he told him softly. “I’ll be right back.”</p><p>For a moment, Klaus clung on to Five’s hand before letting go. “Okay.”</p><p>Five nodded, disappearing quickly into the next room. “We need to get everyone back here ASAP,” he called, glancing back around the doorframe, now sans blazer and tie. He vanished again but Klaus appreciated the quick visual reminder that he was okay. </p><p>He wondered if that was intentional. </p><p>“Why?” Luther asked. </p><p>“I found us a way home,” Five announced, coming back. He was dressed in a new shirt and vest and was wiping at the blood on his face with a rag. </p><p>“Let me help,” Klaus volunteered quickly. He stood on shaky legs and bounded over to Five, taking the washcloth from him before Five could protest. </p><p>For a second it looked like Five might forcefully take back the cloth, but he stilled his hands, grudgingly allowing Klaus to take care of him. </p><p>“Home?” Diego asked. </p><p>“Home. 2019. A nice, no-apocalypse, totally normal future.”</p><p>“Really? How?” Luther demanded.</p><p>“Irrelevant.” Five allowed Klaus to manipulate his jaw, turning his head so he could better clean the blood. “All that matters is that we are all back here in⏤ ” he glanced at his watch. “Sixty-three minutes.” </p><p>“Why sixty-three minutes?” Diego asked. </p><p>“Because that’s the window of opportunity,” Five snapped. “No more questions, we’re burning time. You and Luther go get Allison, I’ll get Vanya.” He pulled away from Klaus gently, working on the fresh tie he had draped over his shoulders. </p><p>“What about me?” Klaus asked. </p><p>Five glanced at him where he stood a little dejectedly, the bloody rag twisted in his hands, and his eyes still glossy and red from crying. “I think you should maybe rest,” he suggested carefully. “Stay here.”</p><p>“That’s a good⏤” Diego started to agree.</p><p>“No,” Klaus protested. </p><p>“No?” Five raised an eyebrow. </p><p>“No,” Klaus said more firmly. “You, young man, are not going anywhere alone ever again.” As if to make his point, Klaus snagged Five’s hand away from the shirt collar he was fixing and grasped it tightly in his own. “I’m coming with you.”</p><p>Five looked at their entwined grasp with mild annoyance. It was unfair how much larger Klaus’ hands were than his. He was about to argue that Klaus stay behind when another small tremor ran through his brother’s arm. Five met Klaus’ eyes and saw the determination and barely disguised fear there. He sighed with somewhat exaggerated irritation. “Fine. You can come with me. But I’m driving.”</p><p>Klaus grinned. “If we get pulled over, you’re explaining to the cop why a thirteen-year-old is behind the wheel.”</p><p>“Klaus, it’s the sixes. No one cares about underage driving,” Five joked dryly. He jostled his hand, attempting to free it but Klaus clung on. At Five’s incredulous look he only smiled wider. </p><p>“We’re stuck like glue!” Klaus sang happily, swinging their hands back and forth. </p><p>Five let out a long-suffering sigh. “You’re going to have to let go when I’m driving.” </p><p>Klaus looked disappointed for a moment before he smirked and started pulling Five down the stairs. “Come on then! The sooner we get done with the driving, the sooner we can hold hands again!” He laughed at the look of hopeless resignation on Five’s face. </p><p>“You’re never going to stop doing this aren’t you?” he groaned, though his annoyance was a little bit for show. Five would never admit it out loud, but the warmth of his brother’s hand over his felt kind of nice. </p><p>“Remember, be back here in sixty minutes! Your synchronized watches are in the kitchen!” Five called over his shoulder to Luther and Diego, letting Klaus lead him outside, their fingers interlaced tightly. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you!</p><p>Lmk what you think! I take constructive criticism and glowing praise ;)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which the roles are reversed and Five talks to Klaus about having actually seen his siblings' dead bodies.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey.</p>
<p>So.... I know I said this was done. But this is also, somehow, like my most popular fic? (Which is funny because I wrote the original thing in like... an hour and a half. Two hours MAX. And did not expect much in response at all. But here we are. That's not a brag btw. It's just hilarious to me. For real, thank you.) </p>
<p>Anyway, due in part to the love that I have received but mostly due to Juani asking... and asking... and asking for more (really, thank you, darling, I'm very flattered) here is another part. </p>
<p>BUT this actually *is* it. I have no intention of doing any more. This is it. The end. No more! It is finished!</p>
<p>But please, enjoy. I wrote this out of love and I hope you love it too &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It had been six months since they returned to their own timeline and all had been quiet. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The world was absolutely, completely calm, totally devoid of time-traveling assassins bent on destroying the Hargreeves family, nuclear warfare, or their father.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five didn’t trust it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After having spent so much time with the Commission breathing down his neck and the apocalypse haunting his every thought, the idea of it being over was incomprehensible. Every day, he scanned the streets for suspicious figures in blue suits and listened to each silence for the sound of heels against the tiled floor of the Academy. But there was nothing. Life pressed on, the wider world completely oblivious to how narrowly they avoided a tragic fate while the Hargreeves slowly adjusted to the resumption of their lives. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Or more accurately, they adjusted to their new lives, which on the whole were significantly less lonely than they had been before Five dropped out of the sky, though, of course, they were occupied with a level of chaos that only six super-powered siblings with baggage could conjure. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>While the Academy wasn’t the permanent home of everyone, it was frequently filled with siblings who had come home for a weekend or who were dropping by for lunch or simply wishing to spend an afternoon around their family. It seemed somehow more full than it had when they were children who seldom even left the building. Perhaps it was their happiness that took up space, chasing the shadows to the far corners of their home and leaving fresh, sun-bathed air behind. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five remained at the Academy for several reasons, most notably of which being that he was still far too young in appearance to rent his own apartment and everyone agreed it was a bad idea for him to move into anyone else’s place. His days were spent wandering the city in search of the best coffee shops and old bookstores and anywhere he could find some peace and quiet when everything else was too stifling. Mostly he just tried to find a use for the suddenly vast and intimidating amount of time he found stretching before him. As a man well into middle age, Five was aware of how long life could be and without a clear purpose or a long list of chores needed to ensure his basic survival, he was struggling to fill the seemingly endless hours of the day.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And if Five struggled to get through the week, then he certainly wasn’t sure what exactly his plan for the rest of his life was. To try and integrate back into society as a normal teenager was out of the question, though all of his siblings, Klaus and Vanya in particular, seemed to be set on “making up for lost time” and dragged him to any concert, movie, park, or other various family activity that they thought</span>
  <em>
    <span> encompassed the spirit of the youth he’d lost⏤ </span>
  </em>
  <span>or whatever it was Klaus had said.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Most of the time, it wasn't a real problem. At worst, it was an annoying afternoon that Five had to sit through to make his siblings happy. Most of the time.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sometimes, not too frequently, but often enough to be of note, there were days when going out into the busy world, filled with an almost overwhelming amount of life, was simply too much. The noise of people talking and laughing would build until his ears were ringing and the proximity of so many bodies made his skin crawl with just the idea of someone brushing his arm by mistake. On those days, Five would vehemently refuse to go along with their plan, no matter how appealing it might have been on another day. If snapping at whoever was trying to drag him out of his room didn’t work to scare them off, he would simply warp away to somewhere private and quiet where he could sit and breathe until his heart stopped skittering against his chest like a frightened rabbit and his hands no longer trembled. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To be fair, it was likely difficult for his siblings to tell when it was genuinely a bad day, if they realized he had bad days at all. No matter how much he actually wanted to go⏤ and despite the fact that he would aggressively deny the fact if anyone ever asked, Five often enjoyed himself on their outings and looked forward to them more often than not⏤ he always made a fuss about not wanting to go. He wasn’t sure why he did really, only that it made something in his chest tighten when he thought about admitting how much he liked it when someone came to get him for family dinner or willingly sat through a movie that he knew bored the hell out of them simply because they knew he would like it. No, instead he grumbled exaggerated annoyances at their care while hiding a small smile of affection when they turned their backs and kicked himself for his inability to just tell them he loved them already, his ego be damned.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>So really, his good days didn’t look too different from his bad days at first glance and Five was not inclined to enlighten his siblings on the difference. It was much safer, much less embarrassing, to be perpetually grumpy. He was the oldest, after all. It was his job to protect them. They did not need to know that there were nights he couldn’t sleep, the back of his eyelids stained with the image of his siblings’ broken, bloody bodies. If there were times when Five needed to creep into their bedrooms while they slept, just to check that they were still there and still breathing, that was entirely his business. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Until Klaus woke up.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It had been a bad day for Five. Allison was currently away visiting Claire on an extended trip, Vanya was busy and hadn’t stopped by the Academy in over a week, and Diego had been minorly injured stopping a mugging on his way over for dinner. He'd come stumbling in, his jacket torn and a piece of bloody fabric held against this temple, a red stain down his cheek and across his fingers. In the end, it didn't even need stitches. The head just tends to bleed a lot. But that did nothing to stop the familiar tension from seeping into Five's bones. No matter how small the wound, Five’s heart always skipped a beat when he saw his family bleed and combined with everything else, the incident had triggered his nightmares to a degree he hadn’t experienced in several weeks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five gave up on sleep that night after he woke from a particularly bloody dream in which he stood over the mutilated bodies of his victims from the Commission, triumphant, only for them to morph into his siblings as Five realized that he had killed the people who meant more to him than anything. Somewhere unseen, the Handler laughed and laughed and laughed, her cruel voice turning his blood to ice as he collapsed to his knees. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The dream was disturbing and after managing to get his shaking breaths under control, Five fled his room, walking quickly but quietly through the house. He visited Diego’s room first and found him passed out on top of his sheets, still dressed but looking entirely peaceful. With trembling hands, Five pressed gentle fingers to the tender spot of his throat just under the curve of his jaw and felt for a pulse, watching as Diego’s chest rose and fell in an even wave. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The steady beat helped to regulate Five’s own racing heart. Some of the tension in his shoulders eased. He moved his hand to brush Diego’s hair away from his forehead to glance at the small bandage that had been placed over his cut. It didn’t appear to be soaked through at all, which meant it must have stopped bleeding. He relaxed further. Everything was fine. Diego was fine. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five extracted his hand carefully and stood for a moment, watching Diego sleep before turning and leaving the room as silently as he’d entered, closing the door with a tiny click behind him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He repeated the process with Luther’s room, smiling to himself just a little at how comically large he looked in comparison to the bed. Someone should really suggest to Luther that he get a new mattress. There had to be some version of a king bed that fit him. Or at least fit him better than what he currently had. It just couldn't be comfortable.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Luther stirred slightly as Five held his wrist but he didn’t wake, his heart remaining a steady, low thrum against Five’s fingers. Before he left, Five pulled the blankets up more securely around Luther’s shoulders. He looked cold. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As usual, Klaus’s room was bright when Five slipped in, but Klaus seemed as asleep as the others had been. He always slept with the lights on, Five had realized, or rather remembered, quickly after he began making his late-night checks soon after restoring the timeline. The need for comfort, however small it may be, was something Five could relate to and he didn’t begrudge him for it, even if it had nearly given him a heart attack the first time he came to check on Klaus, thinking he was about to be caught in the act. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He crossed the floor silently. Klaus was curled in a ball under his blankets, his hair a tangled halo around his head. His arms were too tight to his chest for Five to take his wrist and so he moved to slip Klaus’s hair from his neck to feel for his pulse there. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As his fingers brushed lightly across his skin, Klaus’s eyes flew open and he moved faster than Five was aware he could, grabbing Five’s wrist tightly in his hand, the force bruising. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five gave a startled, strangled shout and nearly reacted on instinct before remembering that it was Klaus and he shouldn’t kick him in the ribs.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For a moment they were both frozen, staring at each other with wide eyes. Klaus’s chest was heaving and Five could feel his own pulse beat rapidly against the almost painful hold Klaus had around his wrist. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Five?” Klaus croaked, clearly still confused but at least recognizing that he wasn’t in danger. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey,” Five said awkwardly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What’s going on? Did something happen?” Klaus pulled him closer, seemingly without realizing he was doing so. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five winced as the delicate bones in his wrist clicked. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As if it were something detached from his body, Klaus looked down at where he was gripping Five and his eyes widened. He dropped Five’s arm quickly, paling at the sight of the finger-shaped marks he left while Five moved to cradle the injury reflexively. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck,” Klaus hissed. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m fine,” Five told him, pointedly shaking out his wrist as if it were no more than a little cramped, carefully hiding his grimace of pain. “And so is everyone else. Sorry I scared you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay. Good. Then, if you don't mind me asking, brother dear, why exactly were you doing in here at⏤” Klaus squinted at the clock on his bed stand table. “Two twenty-three in the morning?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing,” Five muttered, his face uncomfortably warm. “Sorry.” He tried to leave.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, no,” Klaus said dryly, lightly snagging Five’s shirt as he tried to turn away. “That’s not an explanation, kiddo.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five stared at him flatly. “I’m old enough to be your father.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ew.” Klaus made a face. “Don’t compare yourself to Dad.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t call me kiddo.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Okay, okay. That’s still not an explanation, </span>
  <em>
    <span>old-timer. </span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five rolled his eyes. “I was just…” Maybe it was the exhaustion, but Five couldn’t seem to think of a plausible excuse for why he was creeping into Klaus’s room at night and his pause dragged on too long.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just?” Klaus prompted. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He was sitting up in bed, his knees to his chest and his arms wrapped loosely around them. His hair stuck in several places, making him look ridiculous and somehow younger than he was. Five softened. He forgot sometimes, how young his siblings were. Practically children still. He’d lived almost twice as long as them now. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was just checking on you,” Five admitted quietly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Whatever Klaus had been expecting, it wasn't’ that. His eyebrows lifted in surprise. “Checking on me? Why?” He frowned suddenly, his grip on his knees tightening. “I’m not using.” He looked hurt. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five could have hit himself. “I know you’re not.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus relaxed a hair at the vote of confidence, asking, “Then what?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He sighed and shifted awkwardly. Five hated being emotional but he’d dug himself into a hole and left himself with little choice other than to tell the truth. He took a moment to look at the ceiling and curse his idiocy before he sighed and steeled himself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Look,” he said, sitting on the bed. “You remember when you thought I was dead?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus flinched. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five winced internally. Not his most tactful moment. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Klaus rasped. “Funnily enough I do.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I…” Five tried to find a way to phrase it. “I understand how you feel. Felt. Kind of.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus didn’t say anything, but he looked at Five with curiosity. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I, when I went to the future and saw the apocalypse, the first one, I saw you guys. Dead. I saw your bodies.” He stared at his hands, twisting his fingers round and round themselves. “You were body and broken and dead. I buried you. I was alone and you were all dead and I couldn’t do anything to help and I was stuck and I was alone and you were all </span>
  <em>
    <span>dead. </span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To an extent, Klaus had already known what happened in the first apocalypse, Five had told them that they didn’t make it. He hadn’t been so detailed about it though. Really, Klaus supposed it shouldn't have been a surprise. It made sense. If Five hadn’t seen them dead, then he, theoretically, wouldn’t have been so sure that they were dead. Still, it was a little disturbing to hear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was thirteen. Actually thirteen, not just looking like it. And I was a dumb fucking kid so full of my own hubris. But that taught me my lesson. Or it taught me a lesson at least. But that’s not the point.” Five swallowed. “The point is I was a kid and I saw all of you dead and I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t sleep sometimes. I have nightmares where I do something wrong, I make some misstep I don’t even realize I’m making and I trigger the apocalypse again and this time I can’t stop it and you all die again. Or worse, that all of this, making it back to 2019, seeing you again, stopping the apocalypse, that that was the dream. That I’m still there in that barren wasteland and you’re all dead and I’m never going to see you again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sometimes, I have a hard time telling too. Or remembering. Sometimes I just… need to make sure you’re still alive.” Five ducked his head. “On bad nights, I come down here and I check on everyone. I just need to make sure you’re all breathing and I feel your pulse and I know you’re alive. It doesn’t make it go away but it helps. It reminds me. I’m sorry. I know it’s weird. I’ll stop.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus took a long moment to process that. “Five,” he finally whispered, tenderly, carefully. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Hesitantly, Five looked at him, shame curling his spine. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus’s big eyes were damp as he slowly reached out a hand, silently asking permission. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five extended his own hand and Klaus took it, much gentler than he’d grabbed Five’s wrist earlier that night and he guided it to his chest in a mirror of the motion that Five had made that terrible afternoon that Elliot died. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Under his palm, Five could feel Klaus’s heart. It was a little faster than normal maybe, but it was strong and steady and real. His chest rose and fell with each breath and he gave off a slight warmth of life. Five melted into it, pressing every bit of his hand that he could against Klaus’s chest as if the assurance of Klaus’s life ensured his own survival. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m here,” Klaus told him quietly. “You’re here. You did it, Five. You saved us. You’re home. You’re safe. Everyone is alive. Everyone is safe.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With each of his affirmations, a small chip was made in the damn around Five’s emotions and he could feel himself crumbling. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You were so brave,” Klaus whispered. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five broke. Hot tears ran down his cheeks and his shoulders gave a great shake as the grief and rage and horrible crushing fear that he’d been carrying for so long was finally released. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It is impossible to say who moved first, but Five and Klaus came together almost in one motion, Klaus wrapping Five tightly in his arms as he collapsed into Klaus’s chest, sobbing. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus could barely see himself as he pressed his nose into Five’s soft hair, his shaking hand coming up to stroke the back of his head as he murmured comforting sounds and reassurances. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It took a long time for them to both calm down and even when he stopped crying, Five didn’t fully pull away from Klaus, choosing instead to lean against his chest, wrapped loosely in Klaus’s thin arms. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry,” he croaked. “Got you all full of snot.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus laughed roughly. “I don’t care. Been covered in a lot worse.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ew,” Five muttered, pressing closer, not at all repulsed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Besides,” Klaus laughed. “I love you so it doesn’t count.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five stiffened and relaxed almost in one motion. “I love you too,” he muttered into Klaus’s shirt. “I missed you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I missed you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I missed… hugs,” he admitted.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus’s arms tightened. “Yeah?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah. No one touched me for so long.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus's heart hurt. “Forty-five years is a long time alone.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah. It’s a lot, sometimes. All the people and noise and food and touch and the whole world is just all this </span>
  <em>
    <span>sensation</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I can’t do it sometimes. It’s too much. I have to be alone or I feel like I’m going to crawl out of my skin. It’s like my body is on fire and my mind is on fire and I need to get away but I can’t because I’m stuck in my body and the best thing I can do is go somewhere where no one else can get near me. But I don’t like being alone. Not all the time. Just on bad days. On certain bad days. On other bad days, all I want is to be with people because that’s the only way I know I’m not </span>
  <em>
    <span>there. </span>
  </em>
  <span>” Five didn’t mean to speak but something about being held, safe against Klaus’s chest and hearing the steady flow of his breath and the beat of his heart and knowing that everything was okay, it opened up a well and everything that Five had bottled inside was spilling out.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know,” Klaus said, lightly stroking Five’s arm in a repetitive, calming gesture. “The next time you have a bad night, or day, or a flashback or whatever, you can come find me. If it’s a bad day where you want people. And only if you want. I mean, well, I know, kind of, what it’s like. Not the specifics or anything but like, the part where your head is fucked up and you don’t know what is real and the world just feels too much. I mean, our childhood sucked but war... war really sucks. It fucks you up like you’re a raw egg in a water bottle and someone closed the lid and shook it until you’re scrambled and full of jagged little shells."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five’s heart ached at the reminder of all that Klaus had suffered, all that he had failed to protect him from. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry,” he said again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“For what? Not your fault,” Klaus admonished lightly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But⏤”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not your fault,” Klaus said more firmly. “Not going to hear any arguments.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five was too exhausted to protest again and sighed, shifting so he could sit more comfortably without sacrificing any physical contact with Klaus. “Fine,” he grumbled darkly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus gave a soft snort, smiling at the top of Five’s head. “I’m always right.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not mentally compromised enough to agree to that,” Five told him without a trace of annoyance in his tone. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus laughed fully at that comment, shaking his head. There was a contented lull and he spent a moment appreciating the feeling of Five safe and secure against him. After all, he’d seen Five’s bloody corpse in his own nightmares a thousand times. He gave him a slight squeeze, thanking the little girl in the sky for letting Five come home⏤ assuming she had any power over that. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“For real,” Klaus eventually said to Five, getting serious again. “I meant it though. If you’re having a bad day, find me. Yeah?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five considered the offer before agreeing, so quietly Klaus could barely hear him. “I’ll think about it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Klaus smiled. “Good. All I can ask, little brother.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fifty-eight,” Five reminded him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Still shorter than me. Therefore, little.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not for much longer.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He was right about that, Klaus agreed silently. Five had shot up quickly over the past months, for once having access to proper nutrition and, at least occasionally, sleep. “Therefore I have to make as much use of it as I can, while I can,” Klaus argued. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, hush. Let me love you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Five didn’t protest again, but Klaus felt Five's grip around his middle tighten for just a moment. He smiled and squeezed Five back just as gently, as if he were precious and made of glass. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Screw that, he was precious.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And he was home. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And he was safe.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And he was so, so loved. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And Klaus would do everything in his power to show him that.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>When he woke up near mid-day, still in Klaus’s bed, Five was embarrassed by his vulnerability but he couldn’t bring himself to regret it. And he especially couldn't when Klaus started making such an effort to make him feel safe. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He didn’t realize what it was at first, but in the days and weeks following his confession, Five slowly picked up on the changes that Klaus made around him. He made sure to get Five’s attention before he touched him, seeming to realize that Five would react badly to sudden and unexpected hands on him, but Klaus started touching him a lot. It wasn’t as dramatic as the hug they’d shared, but it was constant. Light taps on the arm as he slid past him in the kitchen, a hand ruffling through his hair as Klaus teased him, a head resting against his shoulder as they watched a movie.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span> At first, Five stiffened every time it happened, still unused to the contact. But as Klaus carefully but firmly continued on his quest, Five slowly adjusted. And as soon as he began to accept the smallest amount of touch, as soon as he allowed himself to accept it, it was all that he wanted. He was starving for it as much as he had starved for food in the wastelands or water in the droughts that seemed to enterally plague the end of the world. He even started to reach out for it on his own too. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Initially, he only touched Klaus, assured he wouldn’t be challenged or mocked for it, but as time continued on, he started doing it to Vanya too. Then Diego and Luther and Allison all in quick succession. He wasn’t sure if Klaus had told anyone else what Five had admitted or if they picked up the cues on their own (Five leaned towards Klaus telling them something at least as no one in their family was exactly good at reading subtle emotional cues) but it didn’t take long for the others to begin reciprocating. He was often too embarrassed to initiate something so intimate as a hug on his own, but as he began to soften to touch his siblings gave him almost enough of them to satisfy his need. And if he really wanted a hug, he knew that if he were to simply stand close enough to Klaus for long enough, his brother would inevitably give him one. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Slowly, it became normal for Five to walk into the room and collapse across Luther’s legs when they were stretched out on the couch or loop his arm across Vanya’s shoulders as they walked to flaunt how much taller he was. He punched Diego lightly on the arm when he was being annoying and once allowed him to give Five a piggyback ride back home after a trip to the park in which he’d gotten pissed and threw his shoe at a man who had spoken rudely to them, losing said shoe in the duck pond in the process. Allison was likely to press a kiss to his cheek in greeting and he grabbed her hands often under the guise of looking at her new set of nails.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For all of them, it became normal for Five to occasionally take their wrist, often across the table at dinner or while watching tv or while walking. He would hold it for a moment, his thumb over their pulse, assuring himself they were really there. No one said a thing about it, but when they saw his fingers twitch in just the right way or his eyes track the motion of their hands, they would extend their arm just enough that he could take if he wanted. Not so much that it would be noticed by any random person, but enough that Five knew he was welcome to hold it if he needed to. He always took it, even when they misread his expression and he hadn’t been asking at all. The physical, empirical evidence that they were alive was a miracle enough that he didn’t need to have a reason to revel in it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>There were still days when he needed to be alone, but his family got better at recognizing those too. When they realized his refusal to come out with them wasn’t the performance of annoyance but a genuine plea to be left alone they would comply, letting him know they would be downstairs if he needed anything and closing the door carefully behind them. The rest of the day would pass quietly in the household, everyone speaking in low voices until Five finally emerged to soft smiles and barely-there touches of comfort on his hands and shoulders. It was Klaus who bought him a large collection of candles for when the overhead lights were too much and Vanya who suggested a weighted blanket for when he needed grounding but couldn’t stand the feeling of another person near him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They helped his sensory overload for sure, but more importantly than that, they reminded Five that he wasn't alone even when he couldn't stand to be by others. It was like having a piece of love with him to guide him out of the dark place his mind took him as it tried to whisper he didn't deserve the peace he'd found. As he lay wrapped in the blanket that he could pretend was a hug, Five watched the candles burn and dance and managed to smile. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even as things got better, there were still truly bad days. Days when he needed to be reassured beyond all doubt that the world didn’t end and his family was alive. Times when a smell or sound or seemingly nothing at all brought back vivid, visceral memories of death and horrible aching loneliness. There were times when a brief touch wasn’t enough to ground him and Five felt like he was unraveling, lost in the betraying landscape of his own head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He wasn’t sure how Klaus did it, but somehow he always seemed to know when Five was caught in the past, or rather the future that didn’t happen. Maybe he just recognized an expression or a way that Five held his body that Klaus had felt in himself. Whatever it was, he always knew. And, whenever it happened, very carefully, making sure that Five could see exactly what he was going to do, Klaus would take Five’s hand and bring it to his chest, right against his heart. He would sit quietly, breathing, his heart steady and strong under Five’s hand for as long as needed until Five found his feet in reality again and he knew that he was safe, he was loved, and all was well. </span>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope I didn't "ruin" this by adding one more chapter lmao</p>
<p>Please tell me what you thought!</p>
<p>Thanks again to all the wonderful people who have read and commented and bookmarked and left kudos and all of that. I adore you &lt;333333333</p>
<p>Love and many thanks,<br/><a href="https://aye-of-newt.tumblr.com/"> Aye of Newt </a></p>
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